UPU Result!

Salam Ramadhan readers!

Ehee.. Blog berhabuk itu ayat cliche. 
Ni bukan berhabuk, ni da jadi sarang tikus da ni.

Anyway, just to inform you peepz that I have applied UPU for this upcoming Sept intake. And well, today is the result day. 

Sadly, I did not get any IPTA. At first, my reaction was pretty much monotonous. I thought that maybe it is due to my incomplete application but in the afternoon, I got the news that some of my friends got it. 

I guess the whole day I was just holding it in. Trying my hardest to stay strong but I end up broke down. Literally. 

Of course, my innerself keep on saying, "Nanti batal puase!" and "Dah lah, Allah is cooking up something special for you." Trust my innerself to come up with the 'Cooking' up term. -.-'

I keep on questioning myself, is it my result? Is it my MUET? Is it something else entirely? But I could not come up with anything. I guess it is pure luck. And my path is not here. Well, I could try the rayuan but if its not meant to be, it is not meant to be. 

Totally malas untuk cari gambar yg berkaitan -.-'

So, to those who fail their UPU application,

I am not saying that I'm strong enough. That I did not cry. That I accept it easily.
I've cried my heart out. I keep on thinking that what if I do not have any future at all? That I stop as ONLY a diploma student. 

I want to continue study. I want to get my PhD before I enter my 30s. It is pure torturing to stay in a University and not being one instead. Heck, I put 101% hope on this. 

Of course, saying things like its okay and whatnot to someone when you're not experiencing it is totally 'URG!' 

But this is reality. This is the world we are living in. This is the country (pfft) with annoyingly unreasonable system that we have to endure. So, just be strong.

Life have to go on. Though I am not sure what my life is anymore. 

GAH!

Okay, so forget about the negative side. Try this.

This is the tarbiyyah phrase from Allah in the lovely month of Ramadhan. Heck, are you going to throw it away? You are lucky enough to have receive it. Allah wants you to go through this period because Allah knows you. Allah knows that you can handle it. In this month of Ramadhan out off all the month, He wants you to remember Him and be close to Him now! 

Forget UPU, this is the chance! This is the chance to prove your status as Allah's humble servant. You may not be the special someone in the eye of human but you are special enough in Allah's present. 

Embrace this test and be thankful. Be thankful that Allah chooses you instead. 

Hey, cheer up heart. Allah wants you to let go of the worldly stuff to focus on you Akhirah. Cheer up friends, Allah is keeping you for something wayyyy more special than this. 

Seriously, I may not be strong. I may not be close to patient and sane but I have people around me that could at least keep me sane and I have Allah to keep me strong.

So do you.

Keep in mind, your future is still with Him. 
Be patient and be strong. 

Ehee ^.^v

Oh btw, pray for me to get a scholarship aitez? I already got my offer to University of Glasgow. Just need the money. Cruel world.

-Maryam Jameelah