1st Nyt of Ramadhan !

Salam once again..

Yes, this is my second entry of the Night.. Yey me for being extra 'hard-workin'' when I should be sleeping cuz 2morow I need to wake up for sahur! Huu~ ni lahh.. Rajin xbertempat..

Okay, so this topic I really am going to talk about Ramadhan and my 1st night of it, this year.. It all start with my friends saying they're going back home.. I was like fyn, watev.. but as usual, wat came out from my lips is never the same as what's in my heart.. I felt betrayed, hurt, and crash -Haha, dramatic nahh- no lahh, just kidding.. I just feel like 'oh okayy, so my first night of fasting this year will be by myself only *hati da sebakk*' I tot of fasting with other friends but oh well, alone is okayy I guess.. besides, I have Allah with me =) .

So that night I went to the masjid with a friend of mine but when we're in, I just lost her totally because she didn't stick around me.. So, alone I solat and sat at the corner while reading the Holy Quran with its Translation.. bless the 'me' time.. I learn alot from it.. Then the terawih prayer came and go with ots of background music of little children scream, laughter and sometimes cries.. We, the jemaah, was well.. In between focusing on the Imam and the children noise... Ahh, such a scene..

Oh, and before I forget.. I accidentally smiled during the solat cuz sumtine happened.. ok, so usually after the Imam recite al-Fatihah, the makmum will say Ameen ryt? and then I heard from a bunch of, I tink primary school boys said Ameen but with extra intonation and long -meeeeeeeen and well, with that cute boyish voice and I was like omg, they sound cute and funny at the same time and yea.. I accidentally smile..

So after the prayer, I sat around waiting for my friend and then I get this idea of poem and then I get all emotional looking at those kids and their mother which reminds me of my childhood memories and well, my parents and I was actually at my verge of tears and I just had to be strong and build up my wall and put on that masked to cover up my feelings of insecure but I know I couldnt hold on longer plus my hunger is getting over my head so I just had to stand up and leave my friend because well, I was offended a bit of her.. I mean, if she wants to stay there fine.. but don't treat me like I'm nothing but a person to go to when u need me. See, told u 'bout gettin' emotional..

So I went to the cafe and bought food and drinks and when back home to the empty room and pretend I'm in the scene of a sad music video.. Haha. And that's when I pour out all of held back tears into a stream of crystal gushing out and yes, I feel okayy after wards and yes, I didn't just look like a Vampire but a real Gothic Queen after that 'event'.. If I'm wearing a scarf, I would surely took a picture of it.. haha..

Well, here I am now.. writing blogs when I shld be sleeping.. Dang! Must be the after effect of reading her blog.. Yes her.. that girl whom I look up to, even though she's not really that okayy with me.. I still respect her like a mini-role model.. hee~

Well, that's it with my 1st nyt and oh remind me, I need to change the layout and all.. It's gettin' old.. Okay, Nyt.. salam and selamat berpuase Darl!